Tuesdays with TJae: Anger. Boundaries. Friendship.
I'm angry - Please imagine for a moment that I called the police on your husband, son or brother when he was NOT POSING A THREAT to me KNOWING that just by calling, he could be harmed or killed!
How do you feel about me? Hopefully, you're angry and want to see me prosecuted for a hate-crime.
In case, the story of Amy Cooper weaponizing her whiteness is not on your radar, that's essentially what happened. She threatened, and then proceeded, to call the police on Christian Cooper and "tell them there's an African American man threatening [her] life!" Her action was in response to Christian Cooper asking her to leash her dog in a park where leashes are required.
These stories exhaust me and they are far too common. These stories are the fuel behind #100Voices.
Seattle, WA is up next on June 27th. Tickets go live next week.
During the quarantine, I've shared my home with a male friend. There are some people who are under the false belief that cisgender men & women cannot be friends without there being some ulterior motive. There is also a commonly held belief that we must establish boundaries in order to have healthy relationships.
While I am inclined to agree with the necessity of boundaries, I have come to recognize that where there is respect, there are already boundaries. When both parties have equal respect, there's no need to specify do's & don'ts.
Unfortunately, we often carry the baggage of disrespect from relationship to relationship (type of relationship notwithstanding) and then rush to establish boundaries to protect ourselves when they may be unnecessary. We're so wired to expect disrespect that we cannot properly prepare for or embrace respect.
In this quarantine life, I regularly pause to touch something that I'm grateful for as a reminder that not everything is out of whack. Today, I am grateful for respectful friendships where boundaries need not be as much established, as understood.
One more thing . . . I'm still social-distancing and not participating in events where crowds might gather. Even still, if you want to join me on the labyrinth to woosah this week, I'll be there on Thursday at 11:15. If you know, you know. If you don't know, ask.